"Ngati ndikhulupilira lero, sichifukwa chakuti mafunso anga onse ayankhidwa, koma chifukwa pakati pa kukayikira kwanga ndapeza kukoma mtima."

Kodi moyo wanu ungayende bwanji?

Kodi moyo wanu ukanakhala wotani ngati, pausinkhu wa zaka 26, mutakwatira 5 a iwo, ana anu atayika m’ngozi yomvetsa chisoni ya galimoto? Mosakayikira, iyi ndi nkhani ya okwatirana amene, mosasamala kanthu za vuto lawo loipitsitsa la makolo, sanangopulumuka kokha, koma anakulanso.

Werengani ulendo wa Bryan ndi Penny kudutsa kuphompho la zowawa ndi kusweka kotheratu kufikira pachimake chachisangalalo. Ali m'njira anali akulira mkwiyo wawo ndipo akulimbana ndi mafunso ovuta kwambiri.

Nkhani zochititsa chidwizi zikulankhula kwa aliyense, mosasamala kanthu za fuko kapena chipembedzo. Zimasonyeza kutayika komvetsa chisoni kumene aliyense amakumana nako mwanjira ina. Nkhanizi zikupereka maphunziro amphamvu pa nkhani za moyo, imfa, ukwati, kusweka mtima, chiyembekezo, mabwenzi, kupirira, ndipo pamapeto pake—Mulungu.

M’dziko limene zinyalala ndi zotayika zimakumana nafe nthawi iliyonse, nkhanizi zikutipempha kuti tiganizire maganizo atsopano ndi kupeza chiyembekezo tikakumana ndi zowawa zathu. Timazindikira kuti timakonda zochitika zina ndi kudana nazo. Koma pamapeto amatipanga tonse.

Za wolemba

Bryan Gallant amakonda kwambiri moyo ndipo akupempha ena kuti achite chimodzimodzi. Akapanda kukamba nkhani ndi kulimbikitsa ena kuchita zonse zimene angathe panyumba ndi m’ntchito zawo, amakonda kuthera nthaŵi ndi mkazi wake Penny, amene posachedwapa anachita naye chikondwerero cha siliva, ndiponso ndi ana awo anayi. Onse pamodzi atumikira anthu m’madera osiyanasiyana ku United States, Micronesia, Cambodia ndi Indonesia.

Panjira yopita kumanda

Kumakhala ngati kukugwa mvula tikabwera kuno. Kukhoza kuyamba kugwa mvula nthawi iliyonse. Imakumbi eesu atujanika kumiswaangano, nkokuti majwi eesu oonse aajanika kumiswaangano. Ndinamuyang'ana Penny ndipo ndinaona kuti chipwirikiti cha m'mutu mwanga chinakhazikikanso pankhope yake. Kunja kunalibe mabingu, koma kunali mdima. Mu minibus munali zii.

Ndinayimitsa m'mphepete mwa khomo la manda a Waterford Municipal Cemetery. Kuchokera pano tikhala ndi njira yachidule yopita kumalo ozindikirawo: malo omwe ndimawakonda ndikuwada. Kuyandikira kulikonse kugwedezeka, kusokonezeka, kupweteka.

Pamene tinali kudutsa manda a manda, nkhondo inayambika chifukwa cha maganizo anga. Dzuwa labata la ku Michigan linawala kupyola m’mitengo yanthete ndi kuvina pamaluwa amitundu yowala. Kununkhira kwa udzu wodulidwa kumene kunalendewera m’mwamba. Winawake adachita khama kwambiri pa izi ndipo adachita khama kwambiri. Ngakhale zoseweretsa za ana zosiyanasiyana komanso zopangira pulasitiki zosangalatsidwa zomwe zimayikidwa ngati zikumbutso zimakopana ndi kamphepo ndikupangitsa malowa kukhala osangalatsa kwambiri. Chidole chilichonse chinali ngati mlonda, womamatira ku kukumbukira, kuwateteza, kufuna kukana kuti malowa ndi malo a akufa.

Munali chete, mwakachetechete kwambiri.

Kulira kofatsa kwambalame m’nthambi, galimoto yodutsa mwa apo ndi apo, ndi kumveka koopsa kwa mapazi athu sizinathe kuletsa kulira kwa mtima wanga. Mphepo yamkunthoyo inali pafupi kuphulika. Ine ndi Penny tinayenda limodzi, tikumakumbukira tanthauzo la kusungulumwa kudzera mu imfa. Tinapeza mzere wolondola ndikukankhira njira yathu mpaka kumapeto; Pomaliza - tinalipo.

Kumanda

Ndinamugwira mwamphamvu pamene tinayang’ana pansi pamwala wapamutu umene unasonyeza malo opumira a ana athu okondedwa, Kalebe ndi Abigayeli. Onse adafera limodzi, achichepere kwambiri, kumbuyoko mu 1994.

Kutengeka mtima kunayamba pamenepo, patsogolo pa thabwa la granite lomwe linandikumbutsa za ululu ndi imfa yathu. Mafunso adandigwiranso ngati mphezi. Aliyense wa iwo analowa mu malingaliro anga ndi mawu aang'ono, "Chifukwa?"

Mabingu amphamvu ochokera mkati mwanga anandigwedeza.

Chifukwa chiyani?

Monga ochita zisudzo omwe achotsedwa ntchito, matupi a ana athu ali pansi pathu. Masewera omwe timawatcha moyo anali atatopa nawo. Popanda mpanda, adathamangitsidwa pa siteji molawirira kwambiri. Kulira kwathu kwakukulu ndi kwanthaŵi yaitali kotsutsa kunali kosamveka!

N’chifukwa chiyani anafa ali aang’ono chonchi? Chifukwa chiyani iwo osati ife? Mafunso anapitiriza kundikumba mumtima mwanga. Ululu ndi chikhumbo chinasesa pa ine ngati mafunde.

Kunayamba kugwa mvula. Mvula inatsika m’masaya mwathu n’kusakanikirana ndi misozi yathu.

Penny anandikumbatira ndikundikumbatira mwamphamvu. Icho chinali chinthu chokha chomwe ife tikanakhoza kuchita: kumamatirana wina ndi mzake.

zikumbukiro

Zokumbukira zinandigwira. Chisoni chinandichulukira. Ndinapsa mtima ndi mkwiyo. Mafunso ochuluka amangondichotsa chiguduli pansi pa mapazi anga. Vuto la nkhanzalo linandiopseza kuti lindimeza. Ndinamamatira kwambiri Penny, ndikuyembekeza kuti tonse tidzapulumuka. Nthawi inaima momvetsa chisoni.

Titagwa pansi pa kulemera kosaoneka, tinamira pansi ndikuyang'ana chithunzi cha ana athu okondedwa kwambiri atayikidwa pa granite ndi plexiglass. tinalira

Chithunzi chozimiririkacho chinafanana ndi makumbukidwe anga omwe anali atayamba kale kuzimiririka. Ndinamuona Kalebe akuyang'ana mlongo wake Abigail ndi kumwetulira kwake kwachibwana. Wachifundo koma wotsimikiza, monga momwe mchimwene wake wamkulu komanso woteteza, adakhala kumbuyo kwake ndikumulimbikitsa kuti amwetulire wojambulayo kuyambira nthawi imeneyo. Onse ankavala zovala zawo zapatchuthi, zabwino kwambiri zomwe tinkapeza pa ndalama zanga zazing’ono panthawiyo.

Pamene ndinayang’ana chithunzicho, ndinayesa kukumbukira nkhope zawo zachimwemwe, zatsopano ndi chokumana nacho chogawana. Koma chimene ndinachiona chinali tsiku limene iwo anafa pamaso panga - mu zovala zomwezo! Mitunduyo inkaoneka yonyansa kwa ine.

mkwatibwi wanga

Patapita mphindi zochepa zowawidwa mtima, ndinanong’oneza chinthu china chosagwirizana ndipo ndinayesa kukonzekeretsa pang’ono manda. Penny anandithandiza kusesa masambawo pambali ndikuyeretsa chithunzi cha plexiglass momwe ndingathere ndi dzanja lokhalo logwira ntchito lomwe anali nalo pambuyo pa ngozi ya tsiku lowopsa lija, chikumbutso chatsiku ndi tsiku cha kutayika, kusintha ndi imfa. Tinagwira ntchito limodzi kuwunikira malo opatulika ndi opwetekawa.

Ndinasisita tsitsi la Penny ndikupukuta misozi m’diso lake. Uyu anali mkwatibwi wanga wokondedwa patapita zaka makumi awiri chikwatire. Sindinadziŵe kuti anali kuganiza zotani panthawiyo, koma misozi yake inaonetsa cisoni cacikulu cimene cinali kum’lekanitsa, kuzilala kwa cikumbukilo ca tsiku limenelo, kuvutika kuti akhale ndi moyo ndi kusunga zikumbukiro zimene anali kuzikonda. Ameneyo anali mkazi wodabwitsa amene ndimamukonda yemwe anatsala pang'ono kufa tsiku limenelo.

Nditamuyang'ana, maganizo anga anathamanga. Ndinayesa kukonza zonse. Tinali aang’ono kwambiri pamene ana athu anamwalira. Tinakwatirana achichepere komanso osaganizira. Komabe, tinalimbanabe m’zaka zotsatira. Ngakhale kuti tinali ndi ululu, tinali titamenya nkhondo kuti tipulumuke. Tinali titamenyana wina ndi mnzake komanso kulimbana ndi chisoni chimene chinkafuna kutipha. Tinali titaphunziranso kukhala ndi moyo ndi chikondi titatsala pang’ono kutengedwa ndi deti lolembedwa pamwala pano.

Kodi tinali makolo abwino?

Adandibwezeranso ku zenizeni pomwe amandiyang'ana, mawu osamveka kuchokera pamilomo yake, "Kodi tinali makolo abwino?"

Kuwala kwina. Kodi nchifukwa ninji imfa iyenera kuyambitsa malingaliro oŵaŵa ndi mafunso ofunika koposa?

Polimbana ndi misozi, adakakamiza mawuwo ndipo adanena ndi mawu otsamwitsa, "Kodi mumamva kuti mumakondedwa?"

Kulakwa kwa opulumukawo n’kovuta kuupirira.

"Inde!" Ndinafuna kufuula! Anali mayi wabwino. Anachita zonse zomwe angathe ndipo ankadziwa kuti amakondedwa.

Koma kumbali ina, ndinkaona kuti ndine wolephera. Ndinali ndisanabwere kunyumba nthaŵi zambiri pamene iwo anali moyo, ndipo pa tsiku loipa limenelo ndinadzimva ngati tate wopanda chilema. Sitinkakhala m’dera limeneli la United States. Choncho sitinabwere kuno kawirikawiri. Pamene ndimakumbukira nthawi yomaliza yomwe tinali pano, malingaliro anga olephera monga bambo adakula kwambiri mpaka adalumikizana ndi chola chamanyazi mtima wanga unkadziwa bwino kwambiri. Lero, monga nthawi imeneyo, tabwera kudzasanzikana. Kenanso.

Inde ndinadziwa kuti sanatimve. Kutsanzikana kwanu mosadzifunira kunali kale zaka 16 zapitazo. Ndife amene tinkachoka tsopano. Apanso.

Ulendo uno tinasamukira ku Indonesia. Ife tikanakhala ku mbali ina ya dziko, kutali ndi iwo. Kodi tinali makolo otani? Ndinali mtetezi ndi bambo wotani? Ndine? Malingalirowo adandiluma, adandimenya ndikundimenya ngati mfuti kumbuyo kwa munthu yemwe wavulala kale pansi.

Zimagwedezeka

Pamene tinapitiriza kulankhula monong’onezana ndi mwaulemu, tikupukuta misozi ndi kutsuka masamba a pamanda amdima, akuda, chitseko chotsetsereka cha galimoto yathu chinatseguka. Nkhope ya Eliya ndi tsitsi lakuda lakuda zinagwedezeka pomwe panali chitseko ndipo zinadziwika kwa ife chomwe akufuna. Iye anatifunsa ngati angapite kudzaona kumene Kalebe ndi Abigayeli anaikidwa.

Ndinadabwa. Tinawauza ana athu kuti akhale m’galimoto. Panalibe chifukwa chenicheni choti ayendere malo amenewa. Iwo sankawadziwa amene anaikidwa pano. Panalibe chowona apa, chinali chilonda chakuya chaumwini chimene ine ndi Penny tinamva ndipo tinayesera kuchira tokha. Koma ankafuna kuchiwona. Nkhope yake inapempha chilolezo pamene pakamwa pake pankalankhula mawuwo.

Ndinamuyang'ana Penny kuti ndimuwerenge maganizo ake ndipo anangogwedeza mutu mofooka. Chotero ndinati, “Chabwino, mukhoza kubwera.” Mwachiwonekere, chisokonezo ndi masentensi achidule ofulumira si zachilendo m’manda.

M’kanthawi kochepa, Eliya, mtsikana wathu wazaka khumi ndi zitatu, anali pafupi nafe, akuyang’ana mwakachetechete pamwala wa pamandapo. Palibe amene anayankhula. Sindinadziwe choti ndinene. Mwina amuna ena akadagwiritsa ntchito nthawiyi kulankhula za zinthu zofunika kwambiri ndi kuyambitsa gawo latsopano la kukhwima mwa mwana wawo. Osati ine. Ndinapitirizabe kulephera monga tate ndipo ndinali kugwedezeka ndi maganizo anga.

Apanso m’galimoto munayamba kuyenda ndipo Hana, yemwe anali wochepera miyezi isanu ndi itatu kwa Eliya, anamasula zomangira anzakewo kuti nawonso ayang’ane. Atamasulidwa, Hannah anathandiza Nowa wathu wazaka zisanu ndi chimodzi, amene nayenso anatsogolera Hadasa wamng’ono, amene potsirizira pake anali kugwedera mofulumira monga momwe miyendo yake ya zaka zitatu ingalolere.

Tsopano onse anali nafe. anayi a iwo. Mmodzi wakhungu labulauni, watsitsi atatu a blonde.

Mantha ali kuti?

Ndinadabwa kuona kuti anayamba kuyendayenda m’mandamo. Iwo anafunsa mafunso, kukhudza chirichonse. Palibe ulemu. Palibe kuyesetsa kukhala chete. Kwa ine zinkawoneka kuti iwo sanali kulemekeza akufa kapena amoyo.

Mkwiyo wosimidwa ndi mkwiyo unandigwera. Kodi iwo sanadziwe chomwe malo awa anali? Kodi angachite bwanji ngati paki kapena nthawi yopuma pang'ono pagalimoto? Inde, anali ana, mafunso awo anali olondola, zonse zinali zatsopano kwa iwo. Koma...sanaone ululu umene tinamva?

Nein.

Kodi akanamva bwanji? Ngakhale achikulire amalephera kuyenda pamzere wabwino pakati pa chifundo ndi chisoni.

Iwo anayamba kutifunsa za moyo wa Kalebe ndi Abigayeli.

Zokumbukira.

nkhani.

kuseka kwachete.

Mtsinje wina wamisozi.

Ndinatsala pang’ono kukwiya, koma kenako china chake chinachitika.

Malo osinthira

Sindingayembekezere kuti wina aliyense amvetse tanthauzo la nthawiyo. Aliyense wa ife amadziwa zochitika m'moyo pamene chinachake chikuwonekera bwino kwambiri ndipo chizimezime chimakula, pamene tanthauzo lakuya limawonekera bwino pamaso pathu ndikusintha maganizo athu a zam'mbuyo ndi zam'tsogolo. Izi n’zimene zinandichitikira panthawiyo.

Mkwiyo utakula komanso malingaliro amandigwedeza, mwadzidzidzi ndinamva kunong'onezana m'maganizo mwanga, poyamba ndidakomoka ngati ndikudzuka kutulo, kenako momveka bwino komanso mwamphamvu. Pomaliza linamveka ngati lipenga!

Kumeneko, m’manda achete mmene imfa imakumbukiridwa ndi zikwi zikwi za anthu, kuphatikizapo mkazi wanga ndi ine, ndinawona moyo! Masentimita ochepa chabe kuchokera kumanda apansi panthaka a ana athu oyambirira aŵiri, ena anayi tsopano anali akungoyendayenda!

M’malo a imfa tsopano munali moyo! Tisanakhale osokonekera, koma tsopano Mulungu - ndi moyo - anali atatipatsa ana ena anayi kuti tiziwakonda, kukumbatirana ndi kukhala nawo moyo kachiwiri! Zodabwitsa kwambiri ...

M’manda amenewa ndinaukitsidwa. Ndikoyenera bwanji!

kupitiriza                                       Chingerezi

Gwero: Bryan c. wolimba, Zosatsutsika, Ulendo Wambiri Wodutsa Zowawa, 2015, masamba 9-15

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